READING: The Governess Game (Girl Meets Duke #2) by Tessa Dare

Publication date: August 28 2018
Published by: Avon
Genre: Adult, Historical Romance, Regency, Chick-Lit 
Rating:

After her livelihood slips through her fingers, Alexandra Mountbatten takes on an impossible post: transforming a pair of wild orphans into proper young ladies. However, the girls don’t need discipline. They need a loving home. Try telling that to their guardian, Chase Reynaud: duke’s heir in the streets and devil in the sheets. The ladies of London have tried—and failed—to make him settle down. Somehow, Alexandra must reach his heart... without risking her own.

Like any self-respecting libertine, Chase lives by one rule: no attachments. When a stubborn little governess tries to reform him, he decides to give her an education—in pleasure. That should prove he can’t be tamed. But Alexandra is more than he bargained for: clever, perceptive, passionate. She refuses to see him as a lost cause. Soon the walls around Chase’s heart are crumbling... and he’s in danger of falling, hard.

I don't know what went wrong with this one, because I absolutely love Tessa Dare.
But The Governess Game was sloppy and quiet honestly, not memorable.

First off, the romance started right away so there was no angsty suspense or any sexual tension/anticipation at all. That didn't feel right to me, because when I'm reading an HR book I expect to be seduced, and this one didn't deliver.
Very quickly Chase wanted Alex, and Alex was thinking about marrying Chase and having his babies from the moment she met him, so that was a huge red flag right from the get go.
I was willing to look past it though because it's Tessa Dare and she is a romance master.
I'm afraid it didn't get much better after that :/

I think my main problem with the book is that I didn't see any chemistry between Chase and Alex. I didn't buy into their attraction and consequently, love. Everything happened way too fast for me to fully understand either of their characters and, so I didn't really get why they were together.
I personally find it very hard to dislike a male character in HR, but Chase was pretty unlikeable. There were times when he was being deliberately mean to Alex and I was angry at him and her for just taking it, despite her self-proclaimed independence. His reason for not wanting to be there and raise the wards that were left in his care was pretty stupid, and it painted him as a complete coward.
As far as Alex goes, I felt that she was blindly in love with Chase and she would do anything for him, whereas he was just infatuated with the next pretty little innocent thing that cam
e his way. I know a lot of HRs have that premise of the rake unabashedly lusting after the cute girl, but a lot of them (the good ones) have provided a fully explained change of character in order for the reader to believe and accept the inevitable HEA in the end, something that The Governess Game never did.

Chase and Alex agreed to engage into some sort of teacher/student relationship in regards to sex, but that was never shown! Instead, we get a sense of time passing by other things occurring, and we think that all the while Alex and Chase are having these lessons somewhere. And they must have been, because Alex was very masterful in the last sex scene of the book, so I guess the lessons must have worked?! We were just never shown them, which was a major let down for me.

The only redeeming quality of this book were the parts with Daisy and Rosamund (the children), who provided a nice respite from the failure that was Chase, and of course Tessa Dare's unparalleled humour, for which I was really thankful.

3 stars on the Tessa Dare scale = pretty bad.

READING: Do You Want to Start a Scandal by Tessa Dare

Publication date: September 27 2016
Published by: Avon
Genre: Adult, Historical Romance, Chick Lit, Georgian 

Rating:

 

On the night of the Parkhurst ball, someone had a scandalous tryst in the library.
• Was it Lord Canby, with the maid, on the divan?
• Or Miss Fairchild, with a rake, against the wall?
• Perhaps the butler did it.

All Charlotte Highwood knows is this: it wasn’t her. But rumors to the contrary are buzzing. Unless she can discover the lovers’ true identity, she’ll be forced to marry Piers Brandon, Lord Granville—the coldest, most arrogantly handsome gentleman she’s ever had the misfortune to embrace. When it comes to emotion, the man hasn’t got a clue.

But as they set about finding the mystery lovers, Piers reveals a few secrets of his own. The oh-so-proper marquess can pick locks, land punches, tease with sly wit... and melt a woman’s knees with a single kiss. The only thing he guards more fiercely than Charlotte’s safety is the truth about his dark past.

Their passion is intense. The danger is real. Soon Charlotte’s feeling torn. Will she risk all to prove her innocence? Or surrender it to a man who’s sworn to never love?

 After reading three amazing books by Tessa Dare, she's definitely going on my author auto-buy list 👏

This one is about Charlotte, a smart girl with a knack for investigating, who is, through no fault of her own, caught in a compromising position with the Marquess Piers Brandon, and is "forced" to marry him. Of course, nothing is that simple, as Charlotte's spirit objects to a marriage of convenience, even when her heart and body don't.

This is a classic Tessa Dare read, and it did not disappoint. Dare is an expert in writing well rounded and likeable characters, even her secondary characters are all interesting and memorable (who can forget that mother??)
What I like most about Dare's books is her ability to combine light-hearted fun with steamy romance, and she does that phenomenally well.
There is a scene where Charlotte's mum is trying to educate Charlotte about sex and its workings using various fruits, like peaches and eggplants. While this is absolutely hilarious to the reader and to Charlotte, she immediately feels despondent thinking that she might never experience something like that herself. This king of level headedness is what I admire in Dare's women. They are strong and free spirited yes, but also pragmatic in a sense, and completely aware of their place in the world, especially when we're talking early 18oos.

That being said, the fact that they are not as fanciful as other HR heroines, doesn't mean that the romance isn't as magical, because it is. In this case, it might have been a little too magical. Don't get me wrong, I loved all Charlotte and Piers's steamy trysts. However, I found it a bit unrealistic for a young, innocent girl, with no prior romantic encounters to suddenly be so open to being that intimate with a man. I am not saying it's wrong, far from it. I'm only saying that I personally found it too far fetched for the era, and that was the only "issue" I had with this book. I would have preferred the thrill of the chase to last a little longer, rather than Charlotte succumbing to Piers so easily.

Piers was likeable for an alpha male. He was funny and serious when needed, and I liked how he seemed to come alive next to Charlotte. But let's face it, men are never the focal point in Dare's books. Women are arguably the more interesting and complex characters, and their involvement with men always leads to the latter's betterment, another thing I love about Dare's books.

If you are into HR and you still haven't heard of Tessa Dare's books (impossible!), please give them a try. I guarantee you won't regret it.
Also, if you are ever in a reading/life slump and you can't seem to get out of it, they are the perfect remedy 👌

 

READING: Part & Parcel (Sidewinder #3) by Abigail Roux

Publication date: December 19 2015

Published by: Riptide

Genre: MM, Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Mystery, Suspense  

Rating:

Nick O'Flaherty and Kelly Abbott had their happy ending in sight when a friend’s call for help almost ended with them losing it to the blade of a knife. Now, in the aftermath of near-disaster, both men are trying to heal and move on.

Moving on together, though, is harder than either of them realized it would be. Kelly struggles with simply being a lover instead of the Doc, while Nick is mired in his recovery. The distance between them inches along in stilted silence.

Desperately seeking solace, Nick finally gathers the courage to sort through the possessions his dear friend and fellow Sidewinder teammate Elias Sanchez left him when he died. Instead of comforting memories, Nick and Kelly find a stack of letters and strict instructions from Eli that prompt them to send out a call for assistance. With Eli’s letters in hand, Sidewinder sets out on one last mission together, seeking peace and absolution from beyond the grave—and from each other.

No...this can't be how the series ends...I refuse to believe that after 12 books, this is how Abigail Roux decides to send off my favourite characters.
How sad. 😢
Granted, Part & Parcel was better than Cross&Crown, but not as good as it should be, and definitely not as good as I expected.

I appreciated the sentiment behind it, it was indeed a very moving story. Having all Sidewinder go on a spiritual journey of sorts while saying goodbye to their fallen brother in arms; it was the tear-jerker story suited to close the series. Why was Zane there, though? I get it, he is part of the gang blah blah but he is not Sidewinder, and his presence there undercut the tone of the story. He stuck out like a shore thumb, something that he even acknowledged himself in the book!
It wasn't a deal breaker though, I could easily have looked passed it if the rest of the book was OK.
It wasn't.

Part&Parcel belongs in the Sidewinder series, so I naturally expected that it would be primarily focused on Nick and Kelly. I didn't mind the other Sidewinder members being there, not at all, but I realised very early in the book that Roux didn't actually know what to do with all these characters so it was very unclear what was the point of the book : was it Nick and Kelly's relationship? Was it saying goodbye to Eli? Was it Nick dealing with his issues? Was it Nick's suddenly revealed past? Was it Ty and Zane? It was none of these things and yet all of it at once, and it didn't make for good storytelling. It was a hot mess, actually.

Nick was not the Nick I got to know and root for in Divide&Conquer and definitely not the Nick I fell in love with in Shock&Awe. To put it bluntly, we was a sad sack throughout the whole book, constantly moping and brooding. And while I completely get why (he almost died and lost a friend) and while I generally like brooding men, Nick seemed to sulk about Kelly, and how he is not worthy of him, and all this nonsense. What happened to the confident Nick? The Nick who inspired all the others with his assertiveness? Yes, he lied to them in Crush&Burn, but come on! He is Nick! His team knows him and has been trusting him blindly for years. Plus, everything Nick had to do for Bell was explained in the end, and all his friends stood by him when he was in the hospital. If Kelly decided he didn't want to be with him after this, it's his decision to make. He is a mature man who has been through wars (!) Nick telling him he is not worthy of his love, is just ridiculous and just drama for the sake of drama. No need for all that. Just a nice, heartwarming story about saying goodbye to a friend concluding the series, would have been more than enough. It reminded me of Touch&Geaux so much, the "I have to create drama out of nowhere to keep the readers interested". No. No need. Yes, feel free to create drama when it's appropriate and suits the story, but when it's out of the blue just to fill the pages with something? Nah, I don't accept that.

Kelly was no better. He was actually the queen of drama, and I wasn't digging that at all. Making a whole thing about seeing an old sex tape of Nick's? Yeah, and? So what? Was he not allowed to have a life before Kelly? And all the back and forth of fighting and making up, and fighting again and then making up again, ugh. Very annoying and didn't serve any purpose.
The way both Nick and Kelly acted, I honestly believed they shouldn't be together. Gone was the sizzling chemistry they had in Sock&Awe. Reading Part&Parcel, you'd think they were this very old couple who got tired of each other and are just looking for a way out. That is how Roux's writing felt like to me-I sensed that by the end of it all, she was exhausted and just wanted to finally finish the book (repeating patterns, phrases, jokes etc.) Also, throwing some LGBTQ+ reps in the last 10 pages, doesn't compensate for the complete character destruction and lack of story.

Finally, the sex scenes, the one potentially redeeming quality of the book, were not great. It felt like Nick and Kelly's sexual chemistry and connection were completely gone, and I personally didn't feel anything going through those scenes. We're talking about the same two people who were hotness personified at the start of their relationship in Shock&Awe. What happened??

I don't know what else to say, I am deeply disappointed in this very weak ending of one of my favorite MM series.
That being said, I will always remember its good moments, and all the reasons that made me fall in love with its characters 🌟

*** 🥇 1st place - 3 way tie between Sticks&Stones, Stars&Stripes and Shock&Awe: these books give me life, I adore them ❤️
*** 🥈 2nd place - very close second is Fish&Chips (nothing better than a submissive Ty 😏)
*** 🥉3rd place - Divide&Conquer (hello Nick :)

READING: Cross & Crown (Sidewinder #2) by Abigail Roux

Publication date: June 9 2014

Published by: Riptide

Genre: MM, Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Mystery, Suspense

Rating:

When Nick O'Flaherty arrives at the scene of a double homicide to find he has a witness to the crime, he thinks it’s his lucky day. But when he realizes his witness is suffering from amnesia and can’t even remember his own name, Nick wishes he’d gone with his gut and put in for vacation time.

Then Nick’s boyfriend and former Recon teammate, Kelly Abbott, joins him in Boston, and Nick finds his hands a little too full as the case and his personal life collide. The witness he’s dubbed “JD” is being tailed by Julian Cross, a retired CIA hitman. To complicate matters further, JD forms an attachment to Nick that Nick struggles not to respond to as they search for the key to JD’s identity.

Trying to determine whether JD is friend or foe as they investigate the crime puts them on the trail of a much older mystery. When multiple attempts are made on their lives, Nick is forced to turn to old enemies and new allies to solve a centuries-old crime before he and Kelly get added to the history books.

 

Very disappointed 😕
I don’t think I have ever rated an Abigail Roux book below 3 stars-not even Ball & Chain which is my least favorite of the C&R series-so you can imagine my dislike for this book. And after Shock & Awe, which I absolutely adore? Ts ts how could you do this to me Mrs. Roux??

I feel like every beautiful and loving aspect of Nick and Kelly’s relationship built in just 125 pages in Sock & Awe, was torn apart in the 225 pages of Cross and Crown, and quite easily actually. I have to admit, I am not a Julian fan. I don’t know what it is. Maybe because I don’t get his relationship with Cameron (like at all), or maybe because he just blends together with all the other alpha, macho males in every Abigail Roux book. He is not something that I have not seen before, therefore he is boring to me.
That being said, Julian is the least of this book’s problems, he didn’t even register.

My issue is: what happened to Nick and Kelly’s chemistry??? And I am not even talking about the sizzling hot connection they shared in S&A. I am talking about their genuine close friendship and comradery. Their scenes felt real forced, and it felt like reading about two strangers. They lost that familiarity and ease they had in S&A and all the previous C&R books, and I never really got why. Granted, they were still trying to figure out their relationship, but they seemed to had it all figured out at the start, but now all of a sudden not so much. There was always something not quite right between them and their scenes were even awkward sometimes.
Yes, and the sex ones. 😟 Not much joy there, as I personally thought their sex scenes were cringey, and they made things even worse.

Kelly seemed to suddenly be on the fence about his relationship with Nick, even though he kept insisting he was in love with him. There always seemed to be doubt in his mind and he, more than Nick, would find a million excuses, like Nick’s work (super unfair to Nick) him living far away, to name a few, to try and justify his uncertainty. He never stopped to think that the only problem was that he was scared shitless to commit to Nick! I would much rather he admitted it, than being a whingey sook for the whole book. Again – this is not the Kelly I knew! I don’t know what came over him in Cross & Crown. Personally, I believe Roux created too much drama over absolutely nothing (or at least issues that could very easily been discussed and resolved) thus weakening the characters, and losing focus of what really mattered.

Nick was pretty much the same, but he too lost his strong and confident personality. He allowed himself to be led by Kelly’s whims, no matter how irrational. I completely disagree with other readers claiming that Nick is turning into Superman like Ty, not at all. I think the opposite, if anything. It gave me the impression that Nick was way more in love and committed to Kelly than Kelly, and that was so not the case in Shock and Awe.
Sigh.

The story was not notable, in my opinion. There was nothing engaging or interesting about the mystery and that made me not really care about any of the secondary characters who were just decorative.
I adore Nick. I loved him since the beginning – getting flashbacks from Divide & Conquer now ❤️ Where is THAT Nick? Bring him back! Or at least naturally change him for the better.

I am warning you know 👉
If you ruin Nick for me on what looks like the last book in the series, I will never forgive you 😭

READING: Harvest of Sighs (Thornchapel #3) by Sierra Simone

Publication date: May 1 2020

Published by: - - 

Genre: Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Erotica, Menage, BDSM

Rating: 

Delphine Dansey carries her heart on the outside of her body; she’s looking for love and chasing dreams. She’s spoiled and selfish, the kind of beautiful that’s made for money and fame. But somehow she’s ended up in my keeping: a pretty submissive I can’t seem to resist, a lover who obsesses and tempts me.

I thought I’d locked my heart away a long time ago, along with all my other weaknesses. But some doors won't stay closed, no matter how hard I fight to keep them shut. She unravels me, just like our friends are unraveling, just like Thornchapel itself is unraveling.

All year long, we’ve been sowing lust and jealousy and pain, heedless of the consequences. But a harvest is inevitable, and so now we must reap our sorrows.

And our sighs.

HIGHLY RECOMMEND READING THE BOOK BEFORE READING THIS REVIEW!

This review is suuuper long because I have much to say. I know it’s boring to read long ass reviews, which is why I divided it in small parts so you can read the part you like and skip the rest 😊

I’m so sad I finished this already! I get so engrossed in these books and the Thornchapel verse, that I feel so empty when I finish them. It’s just hard to come back to reality 😭 

OK so let’s get right into it!
Harvest of Sighs was a bit of a puzzle for me. I can’t quite figure it out. That’s why I was going back and forth with 3 and 4 stars, deciding on 3 one minute and 4 the other.
Harvest of Sighs is definitely different than its predecessors. Apparently, Simone decided to lead the story to a different direction, one I admit I didn’t predict. One with less sex and kink (don’t get me wrong, it hasn't lost its sizzle, not at all) and more character development. Also, we finally see the group interacting with people outside their group and be in places other than Thornchapel, which didn’t happen in the previous books.
I understand the need to change it up, I do. And I admire Simone’s courage to step out of her comfort zone and write something other than the 6 of them having sex in Thornchapel again and again and again, because what’s the point in that? 
Thing is, it didn’t always work. But when it did, it was amazing. 

Rebecca and Delphine
I had my reservations about these two from the beginning. Delphine I like just enough, but Rebecca was always indifferent to me. She is just a cold person with not much going for her, personality-wise. She could be much more interesting (and that goes for Delphine too) if she was given a chance from the beginning. Putting the focus on two background characters in Book 3 of a four-book series and expect us to be on board, it's just too late. If their stories and who they are carried the same weight as Poe, Auden and SS, then yes, probably. If more glimpses of them, past or present, together or with others, were peppered in the previous two books then yes, I might have gotten on board. The little flashback they shared in this book was so well written and sweet, but just not enough and very last minute-y. 
Ultimately, and after a lot of effort on my part, I couldn’t see any chemistry between them, their relationship felt forced to me. Also, the structure of the book didn’t help. Simone would give us back to back Rebecca/Delphine POV chapters, which suddenly stopped in the middle of plot development, followed by a long stretch of Poe/Auden/SS POV. By the time she got back to Rebecca/Delphine I had lost interest, and just wanted to read more Poe/Auden/SS chapters.
I don’t know how this relationship will end, but I think these two should not be together. They were miserable for the entire book, and not in a good way.

Auden and St.Sebastian
Speaking of miserable…how contradictory it is, when it works so badly for one couple and so perfectly for another.
What can I say about these two? They are such a pleasure to read. I was looking forward to their chapters throughout the whole book. Simone does her best writing when it comes to them, and their chemistry is electrifying. 
The scene where SS cried in Auden’s lap ahhhhh 😱. One of my favourite parts of the book. Not only it inspired a lot of emotion, but it was also the trigger of Auden’s change which I absolutely loved. It’s the first time we see Auden doubting the decisions he’s made and the things he’s done. It’s the first time we see him actually stopping to take everything in and realising there is something wrong. I really liked that side of him, and having him of all people have doubts and guilt, this unrelenting Thorn God, it was amazing and beautifully written by Simone. 
Of course, the only person that really gets Auden is SS, that’s why he is the only one Auden confides in, no surprise there. And what followed was so intimate and primal and intense that it would either bring these two together in an unbreakable bond forever, or tear them apart. If you haven’t figured it out yet, their final scene at Thornchapel was my other favourite part of the book, from its beginning to its bitter end. I feel like at this point, Simone can never go wrong with these two, their chemistry is undeniable and effortless.

Incest
That being said, I had a hard time with them this time, I am not gonna lie. 
I admittedly have not read a lot of erotica and BDSM books, so I don’t really know how "bad" things get in books of the genre, but for me personally incest is something I can't get behind, even fictional one. That’s why I didn’t like Forbidden when everyone was praising it, and I certainly didn’t like what it did to my perception of Auden and SS. I liked that SS stood his ground, even though he never stopped lusting after Auden, and put a stop to their sexual relationship. Granted, it was true to character, but a welcome surprise nevertheless, since I was sure Simone would definitely keep them together regardless.
In the end, I begrudgingly accepted what ended up happening between them because of:
1. Their very emotional and gut wrenching scene at the gala 
2. The fact that they are not really brothers. I mean, I’m guessing that in book 4 it will be revealed that SS is actually Delphine’s brother and not Auden’s. 
I’m hoping.
If I’m wrong, I am gonna have to re evaluate my opinion of this book 😬

Poe
Boring as ever. She is no more than a prop at this point. Can Auden and SS ditch her and go live somewhere just the two of them?
Also, the fact that Poe leaves with SS in the end and that it wasn't shown at all! I was shocked. I mean where is Auden’s reaction to losing both of them? Nothing? How can you skip this whole thing, which basically is the heart of the books, their relationship? Very bad.

Becket
I really liked Becket in the previous two books, but I didn’t like what Simone did to him in this one. Right from the start he was shown like this poor lovesick puppy who was following Poe around, something that Auden was not a fan of. In fact, I would definitely not be surprised if Auden wouldn’t hesitate to hurt him if things with him and Poe went sour. I mean, Becket announced he was practically fired and was moving away, and all Auden could muster for his great friend was something along the lines of "OK, see ya". 
I didn’t like how he was pushed to the side on this one, when in the previous two books all 6 of them where in things together and shared this great bond. That goes for Rebecca and Delphine as well. 
The sex with Poe felt desperate, completely the opposite from their scene in the church in Feast of Sparks, which was hot hot hot.
I think he’s not going to survive book 4, unfortunately 💀

While the previous books acted as magnets bringing all 6 of them together, Harvest of Sighs definitely acted as a bomb, blowing them up into little pieces. Some survived, some not.
Bright side: we won't have to wait long for the finale since it's coming out Halloween 2020.

READING: The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang

Publication date: June 5 2018

Published by: Berkley

Genre: Adult, Contemporary, Chick-Lit, Romance

Rating: 

Stella Lane thinks math is the only thing that unites the universe. She comes up with algorithms to predict customer purchases — a job that has given her more money than she knows what to do with, and way less experience in the dating department than the average thirty-year-old.

It doesn't help that Stella has Asperger's and French kissing reminds her of a shark getting its teeth cleaned by pilot fish. Her conclusion: she needs lots of practice — with a professional. Which is why she hires escort Michael Phan. The Vietnamese and Swedish stunner can't afford to turn down Stella's offer, and agrees to help her check off all the boxes on her lesson plan — from foreplay to more-than-missionary position...

Before long, Stella not only learns to appreciate his kisses, but to crave all the other things he's making her feel. Soon, their no-nonsense partnership starts making a strange kind of sense. And the pattern that emerges will convince Stella that love is the best kind of logic... 

Remind me again why this book is so popular? Cause I don’t see it 🙅

After reading all these amazing reviews for The Kiss Quotient – almost all my GR friends gave it 4 to 5 stars- I read the blurb and easily dismissed it because I knew it wasn’t for me. More and more reviews started to come up about how wonderful this book is and I relented. Library waiting period was crazy, but I finally got it.
And it was a total disappointment.

I will start with the positives first. It always fills me with immense joy to see diverse groups of people being represented in books. This is the first book I've read with an autistic female lead and I couldn’t be happier that books like these exist and raise awareness of such matters. Like Hoang herself said in her note, the first book she read with autistic characters, led her through a journey of self-discovery and acceptance.
Aaaand that’s all for the positives.

It made me giddy inside to read about a woman hiring an escort just because she wanted to be serviced by and learn from a professional. Can I get a hallelujah for that please 🙏? Yes yes and yes, it ticks all my boxes and honestly, I personally find it a great idea. Why go on Tinder or meet some rando in a bar who could turn out to be a dud or a psycho? It’s a gig economy; hire a professional if you want something done right. I wholeheartedly agree and support that sentiment 👍
What I don't agree with is the part in Hoang's note where she says “but I hadn’t been able to figure out why a successful beautiful woman would hire an escort”. So successful and beautiful women shouldn’t hire an escort for some reason? Maybe they are lonely, maybe they had sexual partners that were utter shit before, maybe they just want to try it. So, only ugly and downtrodden women should hire escorts because, let’s be honest, no one else would want them? What? No!

I didn’t find the story interesting enough to draw me in. It was a very superficial boy meets girl scenario, with bare minimum backstory to fill the pages. The book was very romance heavy and even that was sickly sweet with A LOT of outdated clichés.(rich girl spends tens of millions of dollars to make a man she practically just met happy. What is this, the Dynasty?)
The sex was OK I guess, a bit weird and awkward at times. I understand that Michael was supposed to be more experienced, that was his whole shtick and the reason he was hired, but I got the sense that Stella was doing a lot of things she wasn’t particularly fond of doing but just because Michel “knew what he was doing” she should trust him and go with it. Not that he forced her to do anything, but there always this eek feeling of her being dragged to do something she was not comfortable doing. I guess that was my problem with the book: we were made to believe that Stella thought she was bad at sex because she was autistic. But 1. how being good at sex would help her in any way? and 2. why was she self-flagellating? She knew that her previous sexual partners were dicks and horrible in bed so what does that have to do with her sexual "performance" and her being autistic? That train of thought didn't make any sense to me and it ruined the whole concept of the book.

Her co-worker Philip had sexual harassment suit written all over him and he was admittedly disgusting. And he was portrayed as such, the monster and villain of the story. Well, the hero (Michael) didn't fair much better, let me tell you. After the woman he claims he loves and respects gets sexually assaulted, his go-to response was to kiss her long enough and passionately enough to erase the taste of the other guy in her mouth. Um, do you realise how gross and disgusting that is? And Stella went right with it, even though it goes so much against her character.
I rolled my eyes at all the things Michael and Stella had "in common", like watching K-dramas and Kung Fu movies. The “beautiful sexy but also quirky and nerdy girl” trope is soooooooo 10 years ago and honestly done to death. 
Plus, these empty and superficial things are maybe cute yes, but where is the connection that actually matters? Where are the real conversations and the bearings of souls and actual no sexual intimacy that would justify them falling so hard and so fast for each other? I just don’t buy it.

For me the Kiss Quotient is undeservingly overhyped. It’s good for a quick beach read if you’re into something fluffy and a bit spicer than vanilla romances, but no more than that. I found it very mediocre, lost interest about halfway through and rolled my eyes at it a lot. There are so many good contemporary romances out there which are way more well written and thought out than The Kiss Quotient, you should try those.

READING: Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

Publication date: May 14 2019
Published by: St. Martin Griffin 
Genre: New Adult, Contemporary, MM, Romance
Rating: 

What happens when America's First Son falls in love with the Prince of Wales?

When his mother became President, Alex Claremont-Diaz was promptly cast as the American equivalent of a young royal. Handsome, charismatic, genius—his image is pure millennial-marketing gold for the White House. There's only one problem: Alex has a beef with the actual prince, Henry, across the pond. And when the tabloids get hold of a photo involving an Alex-Henry altercation, U.S./British relations take a turn for the worse.

Heads of family, state, and other handlers devise a plan for damage control: staging a truce between the two rivals. What at first begins as a fake, Instragramable friendship grows deeper, and more dangerous, than either Alex or Henry could have imagined. Soon Alex finds himself hurtling into a secret romance with a surprisingly unstuffy Henry that could derail the campaign and upend two nations and begs the question: Can love save the world after all? Where do we find the courage, and the power, to be the people we are meant to be? And how can we learn to let our true colors shine through?

I love him, with all that, because of

all that. On purpose. I love him on purpose. 

If the Lord of Over-the-topchester and the Duchess of Over-hypedshire had a child, it would be Red, White and Royal Blue.

Before I am publically flogged at the city square for blasphemy, hear me out.

Red… wasn’t a bad book. It was, above all else, a very optimistic and positive take on the revelation of a romantic relationship between two prominent and powerful men in today’s society. It was very hopeful and sweet and cute and rainbows and glitter and as pink as its cover.

I couldn’t relate much to the characters which was of course to be expected. No matter how down to earth and humble the FSOTUS and the Prince of England were, and they were not, they are still the FSOTUS and the Prince of England. Their lives are outwardly to us and I am assuming ours is to them. So yeah, I don’t really care about extravagant parties and royal weddings that cost a developing country’s GDP. Thanks but no.

HENRY & ALEX
I thought they were both really sweet and their courtship very romantic and lovey-dovey, almost fairy tale-ish. I truly believe that Alex loved Henry (I had no doubt about Henry, he was obsessed with Alex) even though I’d rather he mulled it over a bit more seeing how impulsive he was. I liked their banter and their sense of humor, Henry’s “rigidness” balancing out Alex’s almost clownish behaviour. 
The emails they sent to each other could have been dialled down a notch; rich beyond measure, 20 something year old guys can’t recite so many literary quotes. They can’t recite any actually. Nice touch, but silly after a while.
I have to admit, I was a bit lukewarm about Alex throughout the book. I didn’t believe he was as “real” as advertised, definitely not a Texas country boy and I wouldn’t be surprised if down the line he broke Henry’s heart. It’s not that he was a bad guy, not at all. Like I said in a previous review: it’s the Westernised upbringing: entitled to everything, go get it, you can do it! While that is a great sentiment and I applaud it, it has a self centered undertone to it, a “if don’t like, dispose and get another one” kind of feel. I was pleasantly surprised to see that McQuiston did maintain that difference in attitudes between American and English whether inadvertently or not. Henry was always more composed and put more thought into everything he did and said, not because he was supposed to be the stiff heir to the throne, but because as Europeans we are all programmed to think and behave this way, from royalty to low class. Some of you might think that I am exaggerating or that I am simply wrong. I am telling you though, I wasn’t aware these cultural differences even existed until I migrated from Europe to Australia, so I am speaking from personal experience. 
Seeing that Red…was told exclusively from Alex’s POV in present tense, it was even harder for me to go along and understand the way his or his family acted. That is why I wasn’t particularly fond of the back and forth emails, they kinda took away all the intimacy and didn’t give them the chance to interact with and learn more in depth stuff about each other.
As far as NA MM romantic relationships go this one was OK, but I have seen way better (ahem Mark Cooper versus America) 

POLITICS
Always being on top of what’s happening in the world and constantly educating myself, I have formed my own political views and I will surely not be swayed by a NA romance novel of all things. Apart from it praising Nazis and sexual predators, I don’t mind reading others' political opinions and views. McQuiston is obviously very influenced by the 2016 US election as she mentioned in her acknowledgments, and is taking a very clear stance against a fictional Republican candidate who is apparently very vile. I wasn’t at all surprised at that, as I wouldn’t be surprised if the same was said for a Democrat candidate. I am old and cynical enough to not have any trust in politicians no matter how great they may seem. I don’t begrudge McQuiston’s political stance at all, this is a work of fiction after all.
However, I agree that her characters were one dimensional, Richards was the dark, evil villain and Ellen was the gallant, self-sacrificing hero, which is utterly unrealistic and an obvious lie. I don’t believe for a second that she wouldn’t throw a massive fit when her son’s scandal came out that close to elections or that she wouldn't try to twist it to her benefit, there is simply too much at stake. But again, over-romanticised, super wishful work of fiction.
I would have mad respect for McQuiston if she made Henry and Alex denounce their positions and live their lives peacefully away from the public eye. But I guess giving up Burberry button downs and Gucci bomber jackets was too much to ask.

OTHER CHARACTERS
The rest of the characters were way over the top and I didn’t like any of them :/ Sad, but true. Luna’s story was too convenient and I didn’t like McQuiston springing sexual harassment on me, too much on the nose.

Was Red… over ambitious? Yes.
Was it pretentious? Definitely.
Was it way too long? For sure. 

Despite all that, I’d still recommend it to all the wide-eyed, day dreaming teens out there who haven’t got their hopes totally crushed by the system yet. This is definitely for them.

READING: Kissing Tolstoi by Penny Reid

Publication date: November 7 2017
Published by: Cipher-Naught
Genre: New Adult, Contemporary, College, Romance
Rating: 

What do you do when you discover that your super-hot blind date from months ago is now your super-hot Russian Lit professor?

You overthink everything and pray for a swift end to your misery, of course!

It is popular to say that one must find love within oneself before knowing how to love another. 

I rejected this statement outright, as both imbecilic in theory and impossible in practice. 

Kissing Tolstoy read like any girl’s – or at least most girls’ – fantasy. The sitting under the window sill in your nightie looking longingly at the stars and moon kind of fantasy. The one when a strapping, well educated, knowledgeable man is obsessed with making you his. 
At the end of the day, isn’t that what it’s all about? 
It sure was for Anna, after she meets dapper Russian lit professor Luca who is:
A) Drop dead gorgeous
B) rides a motorcycle 
C) wears leather pants like nobody’s business and 
D) is kind of a dominant. But with a soft side. Duh.
Now why did I always picture Russian lit professors as long nosed, hunched backed 60 somethings, I honestly don’t know. Popular misconception I guess.

Kissing Tolstoy was a really sweet, very funny story about Anna, an unremarkable 21 year old self-proclaimed nerd, who loves jigsaw puzzles and Russian Lit, falling in love with her very hot 32 year old professor.
Before you say anything, yes, I realise the theme is a bit “taboo”, but is it really? 
They are both consenting adults and Luca did the right thing and was responsible and mature enough to nip the issue in the bud when he knew he wanted to pursue Anna. Not that I am congratulating him for common sense and decency, I am just saying that's what happened.
You can’t help who you fall in love with and these things, as crazy as they seem, do happen. Probably not as exaggerated and over the top as in Kissing Tolstoi but I can personally attest that they happen. A close friend of mine fell in love with her professor in her mid 20s and they have been happily married for 15 years and have 2 kids, so there.

I loved the sense of humour in the book, I LOLed on a lot of occasions which can be kind of awkward when you are reading the book at work and the manager/monster is looking at you all weird.

"His words landed like a physical blow and the wind was forced from my lungs, leaving me breathless.
And wretched.
Breathless and Wretched, the new fragrance by Calvin Klein.

What I felt missing from Kissing Tolstoy was EITHER 100+ pages more, so Luca’s automatic obsession with Anna could be explained and justified OR more of Luca’s POV, which would have the same result.
I love reading Russian characters or characters with Russian decent because their mindset is very similar to Greeks: this totally pessimistic and cynical view of the world and people, which I guess is imbedded in our DNA from years and years of political and economic upheaval in both our countries. I always envied the optimistic and confident Westerners who were told they could have anything they want in life and that the world is their oyster. But in a way this perspective, appealing though it is, never felt real to me. So on the rare occasion I read about a self deprecating, mad at the world, defeatist character, I immediately like him.

Overall, Kissing Tolstoy was a super cute and sexy, but unfortunately very brief, story about a whirlwind romance between a college student and her professor. It was very enjoyable for what it was, a very short shot of romance with clever banter and over the top situations that will make you smile, even though they are far from relatable or believable. 

READING: A Feast of Sparks (Thornchapel #2) by Sierra Simone

Publication date: August 1 2019
Published by: Sierra Simone
Genre: Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Erotica, Menage, BDSM
Rating: 

I’m an outcast and a loner, named for death itself. Fate wasn’t supposed to have plans for me.

But then she came back—the girl I once kissed in a thorn-covered chapel in the woods. She came back, and I could no more resist her than I could pry out my own heart. And by some trick of fate, she wants me as much as I want her. The only problem? She also wants the man who owns Thornchapel, Auden Guest.

And so do I.

Eight years ago, I did something to Auden, something terrible. He hurt me back the only way he knew how, and so here we are: our hatred seasoned with pain and my loneliness seasoned with longing. The only thing we can agree on is Proserpina Markham, and she wants us to find a way to be together—all three of us. 

If Auden wants to earn her as his submissive, then he has to earn me as well.

But with the discovery of bones behind the altar and the carnal revel of Beltane fast approaching, it’s becoming clear that Thornchapel’s secrets are much deeper and older than any of us could have ever guessed. And no matter how bright and merry a feast of sparks may be, it’s always followed by ashes. 

And darkness.

Well, I’ll be damned.

Even though my TBR pile is ginormous, I decided that reading the sequel of a book I didn’t like, was the best use of my time. 🙄 But that’s just me, I can’t abandon books. Once I make a commitment, I am in all the way. And A Lesson in Thorns was too intriguing, if nothing else, to not at least try and read the next in the series.

Feast of Sparks starts right where A Lesson of Thorns left off. Not giving anything away, just saying it was something very traumatic and shocking for Poe. So instead of dealing with her grief, she decided instead to have a lengthy BDSM session with Rebecca and Auden, who is now Rebecca’s BDSM student (thirsty for knowledge, that one!). I am not going to judge people’s grieving process and the way they choose to deal with sadness, to each their own. It’s just something about this scene that I found offensive, even though there was not an instance of an objection of any kind or lack of consent. All participants seemed to fully enjoy it, but for me it was too much. I felt like Poe didn’t request the scene because she wanted to deal with her pain and grief, but she just plain wanted to have sex just for the sake of it. That she used what happened to “justify” her incessant need for sex, didn’t sit right with me.

After that, there were short sexy scenes here and there but nothing too major until the very end, something I found very refreshing. Finally we learn about Saint and Auden’s back story and it was a real treat. It was touching and almost romantic to see how much these two loved each other from a very young age and how Auden just adored Saint, which is not apparent in A Lesson of Thorns. He lusted after him sure, but we didn’t see how deep his feelings for him went until now. That was the books’ main difference in my opinion: how unromantic and completely in your face and matter of fact A Lesson of Thorns was, and how more subdued and calm Feast of Sparks was.

That is, until we get to the last scene. Because trust me, there was nothing subdued about that!
We’re talking massive sex free-for-all with all of the characters participating – yes, even the priest. Completely unexplained, out of the blue, but I’m not gonna lie: still hot.

Overall, I was pleasantly surprised by Feast of Sparks. I don’t know if that’s because I had zero expectations going in, or because it was actually decent. Don’t get me wrong, it was stilled filled with silly moments that made me snort, even though they were supposed to be “serious”, but I am satisfied with the amount of effort Simone put into her characters. They had more interaction with outsiders and they were actually putting some thought into their actions.

But everything was just noise compared to teenagers Auden and Saint seducing each other, that was pure gold.

After feeling exhausted reading about copious amounts of sex, I was ready for the ending everyone has been talking about.
And it was a big one (pun definitely intended) 💣 💣 💣
I’m not going to say I was shocked at the actual revelation, but I was surely shocked about the fact that Simone actually went there. I guessed it right around the middle, but I thought “Nah, no way that’ll happen, it’s too risqué”. But it did, and I don’t know how I feel about it. Obviously I don’t like it, but I am sure it will easily be explained away at the beginning of the next book, so I am not going to be too upset just yet.

Confession: I am definitely going to read book 3. 

READING: A Lesson in Thorns (Thornchapel #1) by Sierra Simone

Publication date: March 19 2019
Published by: Sierra Simone
Genre: Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Erotica, Menage, BDSM
Rating: 

When librarian Poe Markham takes the job at Thornchapel, she only wants two things: to stay away from Thornchapel’s tortured owner, Auden Guest, and to find out what happened to her mother twelve years ago. It should be easy enough—keep her head down while she works in the house’s crumbling private library and while she hunts down any information as to why this remote manor tucked into the fog-shrouded moors would be the last place her mother was seen alive. But Thornchapel has other plans for her... 

As Poe begins uncovering the house’s secrets, both new and old, she’s also pulled into the seductive, elegant world of Auden and his friends—and drawn to Auden’s worst enemy, the beautiful and brooding St. Sebastian. And as Thornchapel slowly tightens its coil of truths and lies around them, Poe, Auden and St. Sebastian start unravelling into filthy, holy pleasure and pain. Together, they awaken a fate that will either anoint them or leave them in ashes… 

"If I don’t come at least once a day, I’m miserable. And yet, I still haven’t had sex."

🙅🏼🔴
I can't, I just can't. I never EVER give up on or DNF books but I disliked this book almost immediately. 
I was this close to abandoning it after only 8% but after much consideration, and honestly because I was bored at work, I decided to give it another chance. So naturally, I skimmed.
And skimmed and skimmed.

Nonsense, nonsense, nonsense, skipping all the unbearable pretentiousness (the female lead's name is Proserpina ffs! Poe for short [...]
Other ridiculous names are Auden, St. Sebastian and Delphine. So you get the gist...

Character development was non existent - the only thing we know about these characters is that they like sex. Like, a lot. There is no other personality or character trait mentioned, no life stories, no background, no talk of families, other friends etc. It's like they exist just to be at Thornchapel and constantly have sex with each other. The only thing we learn from the tiny prologue, is that six 12 year olds performed a fake wedding at a chapel behind some rich boy's house, and then three of them kissed. 10 years later and Proserpina (ugh),being the exceptional librarian that she is (is there a bad librarian?) is summoned to that guy's mansion to go through some old tomes - I don't exactly know what she was doing there to be honest because a) I skimmed and b) didn't really care.
Now, she hasn't seen these people in 10 years, and as soon as she sees one of the guys she kissed when she was a kid, she immediately wants him and is 100% sure belongs to her and all that crap. She then sees the other guy she kissed back then, who is engaged I might add, and she thinks he belongs to her too. And the guy, honourable man that he is, thinks the same.

Skim skim skim, and around halfway in Poe finds an old book with an ancient binding ritual in it which is performed at Thornchapel. One person is the Lord and the other the Bride, and they must unite under the fool moon and whatever else, I didn’t get into details.
Of course all of them (practical strangers) went “Yes, let’s do an orgy!” (as you do), and decided to perform the ritual. 

And thus begins a ridiculously over the top tale of endless boners and wet pussies. 
I know, I know. That is basically the definition of erotica. What else did I expect, right? 
Well, some kind of story for starters. Interesting and likable characters, maybe? I have read other erotica books, granted not many, and while they still have a lot of sex, it wasn’t all about that. The characters resemble real people and they have actual thoughts and emotions that don’t revolve around getting off all the time.

A Lesson in Thorns was pure, unadulterated porn. That’s all.
That being said, it was great porn. The scene with Poe’s spanking and the orgy itself which was like 100 pages long, were admittedly very very hot. I personally had some moral objections about a couple of things, but at that point taking the moral high ground was not an option, considering the book I was reading. 

In a sentence, A Lesson of Thorns was an extremely sensual, tantalising, sexy book of complete nonsense.
If you are in it only for the sex and don't care about the fact that there is no story and all the characters are very unlikeable, then go for it. Otherwise, I personally don't get the hype at all.
----
EDIT: Sorry, did I mention that 4 of the 6 characters were basically described as sex on legs, but at 22 they were still virgins? Yeah.